INSPIRING STORIES FROM WOMEN WHO BECAME MOMS AFTER 35


Many women nowadays choose to have their first child in their mid-30s or later. It can sometimes be more difficult to conceive at this age, but these moms say it’s the best thing they ever did.


According to Kerryn Giles, an educational psychologist at Joburg’s Child’s Play Therapy Centre, ‘mature motherhood’ carries some clear benefits: ‘Having spent more time working, you probably enjoy more financial security – and that, in turn, means you will probably have more time to spend with your children, because there is less pressure from the workplace,’ she says.

Kerryn says that older parents may also be more likely to enjoy stable relationships, and have a strong network of family and friends who can help and support them. Of course, younger moms might also enjoy these benefits, but older women are likely to have a network of more experienced friends and relatives. There are definite advantages to not being the youngest mom in the playgroup.

GREATER SELF-KNOWLEDGE
Mpho says she had her first child at 35, followed by twins at 38 – and she’s so glad she did. ‘I definitely didn’t have the emotional maturity to become a mom in my 20s – I was too focused on my career, travelling and partying,’ she says.

Charlene agrees. In fact, she says, experiencing life with her husband during their 20s helped to build a strong foundation for their relationship – a major plus when they finally decided to start their family. ‘We have no regrets around not doing things when we were younger. ‘I like to think that my husband and I are much better versions of ourselves in our late 30s than we were in our 20s, which means that our kids get better learning opportunities.’

Related article: Trying to grow your family? Everything you should know

ENERGY VS WISDOM
Some people believe it’s better to have your children young, when you have more energy, and while this might be true in some cases, the advantages of being more mature, emotionally and intellectually, can outweigh the benefits of a younger body. The stress of having a ‘colicky’ baby, who cries a lot and hardly sleeps, can be devastating for a young mother who doesn’t have the wisdom and resilience of maturity. And young couples who haven’t had the chance to really get to know each other well are far more likely to buckle under the pressure and take their anxiety and frustrations out on one another.

More mature couples, who have been living and growing together for years, are more likely to weather the storm together, support each other and consolidate their relationship rather than grow apart.

Related article: The best foods to eat if you’re trying to fall pregnant

MIRACLES & PATIENCE
Ann, meanwhile, thinks that there is no right or wrong time to have a baby; it’s a miracle whenever it happens. This was all the more true for her, because by the time she fell pregnant at 38, she thought she wasn’t able to have children. She believes that being older gave her more patience than she would have had as a younger mom, and allowed her to handle the teen hiccups with more grace.

My daughter made me get active, keeps me young and forces me to be sociable.


Related article: When second time around isn’t easy

LESS STRESS
Lisa has her own take on this: ‘I’ve been alive long enough to know that I’ll make mistakes, and to know that it will be okay!’ And Lianne says, ‘I was 45 when I had my last born. I think I’m wiser than I would have been and I’m less bothered by people’s opinions, or trying to be a perfect mother – because I know she doesn’t exist!’

For Hille, motherhood at 42 was a blessing. ‘My daughter made me get active, keeps me young, and forces me to be sociable,’ she says.



FAMOUS MATURE MOMS
These celebrity moms had already blown out 35 candles when they gave birth:
  • Jennifer Lopez’s twins, Max and Emme, were born when she was 38.
  • Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex, was 37 when Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor was born, and 39 when his sister, Lilibet Diana Mountbatten-Windsor made her way into the world.
  • Singer Janet Jackson became a mom to Eissa when she was 50.
  • Halle Berry welcomed daughter Nahla when she was 41, and son Maceo followed when she was 47.

INSPIRING STORIES FROM WOMEN WHO BECAME MOMS AFTER 35 INSPIRING STORIES FROM WOMEN WHO BECAME MOMS AFTER 35 Reviewed by Michelle Pienaar on March 03, 2022 Rating: 5
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