HOW TO ESTABLISH A SLEEP ROUTINE FOR YOUR LITTLE ONE

Any parent whose baby doesn’t sleep well will tell you it’s… well, no pun intended – a nightmare! If you’re a sleep-deprived parent praying for a miracle, here’s some practical advice.

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There are as many theories on how to get babies to sleep as there are parents with bags under their eyes. But in all seriousness, it’s no joke to have a baby who doesn’t let you get more than a couple of hours’ sleep at a time. So what’s the solution?

WHY WON’T HE SLEEP?
Babies don’t sleep well for various reasons, so you need to establish the reason before you can find a remedy. Some common reasons for babies not sleeping through the night are:

• Hunger or thirst
• Not getting enough sleep during the day
• Overstimulation during the day, especially before bedtime
• Being too hot or too cold
• A dirty nappy
• Teething, an ear infection or other medical reason
• You are making nighttime interactions too much fun!

With older children, bad sleeping habits can result from learnt behaviour, usually due to over-anxious parents (or parents who feel guilty because they have to leave the child to go to work) trying to compensate by staying with them until they fall asleep, or rushing to them the minute they hear the slightest whimper.

WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT
If hunger or thirst is causing your baby’s wakefulness, hallelujah – the solution is simple! Feed them or give them a drink, and consider yourself one of the lucky ones! If your baby doesn’t get enough rest during the day, this could cause her to become overtired and hyperactive, which means she’s stuck in ‘high gear’ and can’t wind down to sleep. Let her sleep more during the day – when you notice her getting drowsy put her down or a nap. Likewise, if your baby is overstimulated during the day (too many sounds, sights, interactions, activities and just generally too much excitement) this can lead to sleeplessness at night, so cut down on the level of busyness during the day. When babies are wakeful because they’re too cold or hot, it’s usually easy enough to remedy – either add or take away a blanket or item of clothing. And a dirty nappy is a no-brainer – just change it with as little fuss or interaction as possible (and if possible in low light). If teething is making your baby miserable and he’s crying all night, the good news is that it won’t last very long, and there are various products on the market that can help, from teething rings and collars or necklaces to medications to soothe their gums.

WHEN YOU NEED HELP
If none of the above is causing your baby’s sleeplessness, have him or her checked by a medical professional. It could be an ear or urinary tract infection, allergies, indigestion or other medical conditions.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE
‘Colic’ is a problem that’s not fully understood and the jury’s out on what causes it or how to manage it. But some parents find massaging the baby’s abdomen gently after a warm bath helps (go to essentialparent.com and click on ‘baby crying’, then ‘belly massage for colic’). There are also medications that might provide relief, so ask your doctor or clinic sister for guidance. If nothing really works, know that you are not alone. As you sit with your screaming baby in the middle of the night, feeling that your life is over, remind yourself that there are thousands of others all over the world going through the same thing. And it will pass, eventually.

BE BORING AT NIGHT!
Here’s the thing – if you make night-time interactions too enjoyable, guess what? He’ll kick into high gear for some fun! So the trick is to be really, really boring at night. Yes, he’s so adorable you just want to squish him and kiss his cheeks – but leave the cuddles for the daytime. Feed and change him in silence – and preferably in low light. Soon enough he’ll get it – mamma bear is no fun at night so I might as well go back to sleep. 

HOW MUCH SLEEP IS ‘NORMAL’?

Each baby and child has his or her own unique metabolism and some need more sleep than others, but as a general guide this is how much sleep they should get:

1 - 3 months: 14-18 hours (including naps)
4 - 12 months: 12-16 hours (including naps)
1 - 2 years: 11-14 hours (including naps)
3 - 5 years: 10-13 hours (including naps)
6 - 12 years: 9-12 hours

RECOMMENDED ROUTINE
Once you’ve ruled out any of the above reasons for your little one not sleeping, relax. You aren’t the first parent who’s been desperate for a good night’s sleep – and for your baby to be happy – and you won’t be the last. But there are things you can do to establish a routine that will get them into the habit of sleeping more soundly. Every baby is different, but experts agree that these basic principles are a good place to start:

Very importantly, keep artificial lights away for an hour or so before, and during bedtime. Don’t sit with your baby in front of the TV, or texting on your phone before bedtime. Research has shown that exposure to artificial lights – especially LED lights – interferes with the body’s production of the hormone melatonin, that regulates sleep.

Feed them a couple of hours before bedtime, and once they’re on solids, make sure their last meal is easily digestible. Try to avoid ‘topping them up’ with a feed before bedtime. (It’s worth mentioning here that if feeding formula, stick strictly to the instructions. Making their feeds richer with extra formula will not help their development and could in fact cause harm.

Keep the sleep environment and routine consistent and comforting. Bathe them in comfortably warm (not hot) water, sing or play quiet, soothing music – or read quietly to them before bedtime. Then lead up to bedtime with a relaxed half-hour or so in a quiet room with soft lighting, and as soon as they seem drowsy put them in their bed with their favourite soft toy or blanket. Expose your baby to daylight in the morning and afternoon. This helps their inner body clock tell the difference between day (awake time) and night (sleep time).

• During the day, let him or her be part of everyday life and activities. Again, this helps their body clock adjust to waking and sleeping times.

• Don’t wait for your little one to fall asleep in your arms before you put them in bed. They should be drowsy, but not asleep, as this helps them associate bed with falling asleep comfortably.

• If they are fussing and crying at first, stay with them – without any exciting interaction – for a few minutes until they settle down, then leave the room. (You might find that a pacifier does the trick – and research suggests that babies who go to sleep with pacifiers are less at risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).

• Again, be very, very boring when they wake up during the night. Night-time mom or dad is not an interesting person who plays or laughs!

• Lastly, don’t beat yourself up if things aren’t going well. Your baby is sensitive to your moods and emotions, so try to radiate a calm and soothing energy – even if you feel like pulling your hair out. Soon enough, you’ll be sending your little one off to school and wishing they were a baby again.
  
  

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