HOW TO HELP IF THEY NEED TO REPEAT A GRADE

Is your child struggling at school? Whether he or she is in primary school, high school, at university or a technicon, we’ve got expert advice on how you can support them.

---

We all want our kids to sail through school with great marks, so it can be disheartening if they need to repeat a grade. You might want to ground them, shout at their teacher or change schools, but there are actually much better ways to deal with the situation.

BLESSING IN DISGUISE
‘Repeating a grade does not signal academic failure forever,’ says Gumede. ‘We should all try to lift the stigma around failing and rather look at it as an opportunity to learn and grow. The older we get, the more we realise that life doesn’t always go as planned, so coming to terms with something like this (and dealing with it appropriately!) at an early age will only benefit your child in the long run.’

PRIMARY SCHOOL – BE KIND AND COMPASSIONATE
Lesego Mafika still recalls how difficult it was for both her and her son when he failed to meet the minimum requirements to pass grade 6. ‘He struggled with maths and as a result, failed the grade,’ she says. ‘We were both disappointed but I had to support him and remind him that it was a temporary setback and did not mean he was stupid.’

‘Nobody wants to see their little one repeat a grade,’ says clinical psychologist Daniel Sher, ‘but no matter how heartbroken or devastated you might feel, try to keep negative talk to a minimum – especially when your child is between the ages of six and 12. This is when children begin to compare themselves with their peers to see if they measure up.

As they do this, they will either develop a sense of pride and accomplishment or they will feel inferior and inadequate.’ The major problem is that if they lean towards feeling inferior, these feelings can last for many years, so it’s important that, as a parent, you do all you can to boost their confidence during this difficult time.

HIGH SCHOOL – FIRST LOOK AT YOURSELF
Teacher Michelle Gumede suggests that before getting angry or upset (at the teacher or your child) you look at the role you might have played in the situation. ‘Your child is not just the teacher’s responsibility,’ she says. ‘Parents need to help with homework, they need to come to parent-teacher nights, and they need to listen when teachers express concern.’

When parents realise they could have done more, they will find it easier to work out a plan for the future. Whatever the plan, Gumede urges that you keep your child included every step of the way. ‘You need to ensure your child feels heard and that what they have to say about their future matters. This will help them stay motivated.’



TERTIARY EDUCATION – GET SOME CLARITY
‘When my daughter failed her first year at university, her father and I were furious,’ recalls Ntombi Khumalo. ‘But sitting down and talking about what went wrong helped. We learnt that she was struggling with the course material and wanted to change classes, but was anxious about telling us. We allowed her to, and now she is in her third year and doing well.’

‘Parents often don’t understand how academic degrees are structured,’ explains UCT lecturer Alexia Smit. ‘If a student fails one course, it’s really not the end of the world as there are a number of ways they can repeat or replace that course so that they don’t fail the entire year.’ As a parent, you can try to get to grips with your child’s curriculum so that you both have an understanding of what is needed to pass.

‘Universities often have a curriculum or academic advisor so if you’re concerned about your child’s progress, you could ask him or her to make an appointment with the advisor, who can give guidance on their options and next steps.’

CONSIDER A CHANGE
‘Many students fail because they are studying the wrong thing,’ explains Smit. Always wanted your daughter to be a lawyer but she’s failing first year law? She probably hates it! Or maybe it’s just not for her. ‘Perhaps suggest to your child that she switch to a subject which suits her skills. The same child who is failing economics might have a shining career ahead of them in the creative world.’

 JET CLUB HELPLINES
Our free online education support system is run by professionals. If your child needs assistance with their studies, call our friendly experts who are there to help.

TEACHER TELEPHONIC SUPPORT
SA & Namibia
0800 00 45 45

Botswana, Lesotho & Swaziland
+2711 991 8258

For full Educational Support, please visit
studymaster.co.za or studiemeester.co.za

By ERIN COE