HOW TO SUCCESSFULLY MANAGE MONEY AS A COUPLE

We spoke to a few couples about their money management styles, and asked experts to weigh in with their comments and advice.

---

The first step to successful money management as a couple is open, honest discussions, right from the start. Will you have separate bank accounts, or a joint account – or both? Who will be responsible for which expenses? Not addressing these issues at the beginning of your relationship can lead to a minefield of resentment and conflict later. ‘The core principles of effective money management for couples include drawing up a budget, and agreeing on how money will be allocated to your various expenses,’ says FNB consumer education programme manager Dhashni Naidoo. Taking individual decisions about big purchases (like coming home with a surprise new car) is not recommended. ‘It’s critical that both partners are involved in this decision-making,’ she says.

1. SEPARATE ACCOUNTS
When engineer Sipho (38) and marketing analyst Naledi (30) married, she was finishing her studies, so he took care of all their bills. Once she started earning money, most of it went towards supporting her family. They told Sipho he couldn’t dictate how she spent her money. Naledi racked up huge credit card debt that Sipho helped her pay off. He also

pays the bond on their house. Naledi contributes towards their children’s school fees and other expenses, but she refuses to contribute more, and the relationship has turned toxic.



What the expert says:
Relationship counsellor Bheki Zungu says this couple should draw up a list of all their expenses and decide whether they want to split their financial responsibilities. If they decide to split the burden, they’ll have to decide on how. They will also have to address Naledi’s financial responsibility towards her family and agree on how to deal with the issue.

Related article: Why you should never lie to your partner about money

2. SEPARATE ACCOUNTS BUT EXPENSES SHARED BASED ON PERCENTAGE OF INCOME
When government official Dineo (in his 50s) and nurse Ntando (late 30s) got married, she was still a student, and he took care of all expenses. Once she started earning, they had no fixed arrangement in place about who would take care of what. Because he earns more, Dineo pays off their bond and the kids’ school fees, while Ntando contributes to household expenses. They have frequent conflict because of their different financial priorities. Dineo grew up poor and believes in saving for what he wants, while Ntando is happy to buy on credit.

What the expert says:
How they spend their money shouldn’t be a deal-breaker, says Zungu. They need to agree on what their priorities should be. If there is conflict, they can create a new plan that considers their needs, and a system that suits them both.

Related article: Where is my money going?

3. JOINT ACCOUNT
Before marrying, senior manager Mdu (in his 40s) and Boity (in her 30s) agreed he would be the main breadwinner. When she graduated, Boity worked for a short while, but now she takes care of their home and raising their children. Both are happy to be sharing a bank account, and Boity gets an allowance for the household and her own needs.

What the expert says:
If there’s a firm understanding that Mdu’s money is for the whole family’s needs, then there’s no problem. Their relationship should thrive, as long as they have open communication about their finances, says Zungu.

Related article: How to manage money when you have a family to support



DIFFERENT TYPES OF FINANCIAL SYSTEMS
Dhashni Naidoo compares financial systems:

Splitting shared bills by a percentage of income
This seems to be the most reasonable way for couples to manage their budgets. The key is to have open and honest communication, with regular tracking of the budget and discussions about how each partner is managing the expenses for which they are responsible.

Joint account and shared responsibility
With this type of arrangement, it is easier for the couple to track income and spending. But this arrangement only works when both partners are 100 percent comfortable with having this level of transparency. Again, open and honest communication on money matters is critical for success.

Separate personal but joint household accounts
This option allows couples to contribute based on a percentage of their income and the household expenses. Household expenses are paid from the joint account. In this way, they are able to jointly monitor and track household expenses while maintaining some level of financial independence.