I FEEL NOTHING: HOW TO DEAL WITH EMOTIONAL NUMBNESS

Feeling overwhelmed and emotionally drained is fairly common this time of year and even worse since the pandemic. You might even feel emotionally numb. Let’s look at what that is and how to get through it.

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Emotional numbness, or affective blunting means you seem unable to feel emotions. Good or bad, there’s just nothing. You're empty inside. It’s as if something cut off your emotions.

Here's how people typically describe how this feels. Disconnected from your body or thoughts. Detachment from the world. Outsider in your own life. Losing track or a sense of time. Struggling to connect with others. Inability to respond to emotional and physical signals. Emptiness. A sensation that you have no future and won’t ever feel anything ever again. An invisible barrier between you and the world.

People who feel emotionally numb struggle with mainly two things: processing and expressing emotions. You have a hard time making sense of your feelings and showing them to others. When this happens, it can feel hard or even impossible to express or enjoy positive feelings and experiences.

WHY DO YOU FEEL NOTHING?
Experts can’t give you a straight answer yet, but they have some ideas. It can happen when stress hormones flood your limbic system. This is the part of the brain that works with behaviour and emotions, especially when it comes to survival: feeding, reproduction, caring for the young, fight or flight responses. High stress tests your emotions and makes you physically tired. When body and emotions are both under strain, you can feel drained and numb.

What brings this on is mostly depression, anxiety, high stress and post-traumatic stress (aftershocks, for instance) and nervousness. Very often, it’s meds for anxiety and depression that may affect how the brain processes mood and emotion.



Related article: What is mental illness?

THINGS TO DO RIGHT AWAY
This isn't permanent. You just have to figure out the causes. Your doctor can help with this, first by checking your meds and maybe sending you to a therapist. Many of us can’t afford that, though, but a bit of self-help could go a long way. Here are some suggestions.

Move. You probably don’t feel like doing much at all. Just pulling the duvet over your head for a bit might be soothing. But eventually, you can release some emotional overload by moving around. Not a workout, just moving about at home, slowly getting a few chores done. Play your favourite music and dance or sway a little. Do a short walk.

Talk. When you feel as if nobody will understand, you might find it easier to feel nothing at all. Even so, reach out to loved ones or friends. It could be a relief to put in words how you feel. If you don’t want to open up, talk to yourself by using one of many apps that help you manage and understand your feelings. Look at these three popular options:

1. Daylio goes beyond mood tracking, allowing you to jot down thoughts or keep a private journal.
2. Mood Log helps you track anxiety, depression, menstruation, panic attacks, headaches, cramps and more. You can note how bad it was and what meds you had taken.
3. Moody Month helps women track hormonal fluctuations and mood over the course of the menstrual cycle. This could help you identify how these swings, lifestyle changes and overall health influence your well-being.

Do a search for “mood tracker” in your app store and you’ll find other interesting free options as well.



Related article: 5 Reasons why therapy could be helpful



Ground yourself. Gently bring awareness to your body and surroundings with these techniques, often used for PTSD and anxiety.

• Breathe deeply and notice your breath moving in and out of your body.
• Touch a familiar object and notice how it feels in your hands. Heavy or light? Smooth or rough? Warm or cool?
• Notice colours around you. Try to find and name five blue, green, or red objects in the room.
• Hold a piece of ice in your hand. How does it feel as it melts? Name the sensations.
• Put on a favourite song and really listen to it as if you haven’t heard it before.
• Lie on the bed next to your sleeping baby or toddler. Pay attention to every breath, sound and movement.
• Sit in a comfortable chair with both feet on the ground. Use one hand to squeeze firmly the main parts of the body, in particular the arms and legs. Repeat on the other side of the body. The pressure helps to calm the nervous system which makes you feel less anxious.

IN THE LONG TERM
Meditate. Start small. Sit comfortably with your back against a wall. Relax your gaze or close your eyes. See what thoughts go through your mind, almost as if you are sitting somewhere and watching people walk by. Play some light classical music, known for evoking powerful emotions. Mozart isn’t just for brilliant babies. Try it yourself.



Exercise. Half an hour a day, five days a week is recommended. Running, swimming, yoga are all great, but even a walk around the block can help flood your brain with endorphins. They are chemicals produced naturally by the nervous system to cope with pain or stress – often called “feel-good” chemicals.

Sleep. Try to go to bed and get up at the same time each day. Eight hours of good sleep every night could improve your mood quickly.

Eat. Keep it healthy and regular and it will help stabilise your mood.

Make stress less. Reduce the stress factors in your life. For stress you can’t get rid of, such as exams and work that has to be done, techniques such as meditation or mindfulness will help you manage it better.

Related article: 13 Warning signs you’re heading for a burnout

Useful links:
· South African Depression and Anxiety Group or call 011 234 4837.
· BetterHelp offers affordable private therapy.

Sources: https://www.healthline.com, https://psychcentral.com, https://medicalbewstoday.com, https://qbi.uq.edu.au/brain/brain-anatomy/limbic-system, https://zrcounselingservices.com, https://greatist.com